Roryworld

The boy is making himself heard. Here's some of Rory's four and a half month old language...

(Bottom lip petted, brow furrowed) "Mwoo" = I'm sad.
"Bwwoo" = this is worse.
"Mwoo bwoo" = call social services, these idiots clearly can't be my real parents.

"Mum" = probably just the product of Alison's fond imagination (but I'm telling you, he said it!).

(Eyes and mouth wide open) "Ah! Ah! Ah!" = FLYING IN THE AIR IS THE BEST THING THAT'S EVER HAPPENED TO ME.

(Softly) "Urgh... Urgh..." = due warning, I'm about to get pissed off being left here in my cot.
(Loudly) "A-A-URGH!" = I told you so.

Any or all of licking lips/ wide eyes staring at Alison's chest/ pawing at her t-shirt = not so subtle hints of hunger.

(Satisfied) "Hum." = I have captured my little lion and it's not getting away this time. I'm gonna eat your head.

(Beaming) "Heuww..." = good morning, world!

Cough, cough, splutter = I am so going to vom all down you in a minute... just let me get into position here at the neck of your t-shirt... bomb doors open... that's the hit of the whole vom...

Looking up and not making eye contact, apparently doing really hard sums or something = something really bad landing in the nappy in about two minutes.